This is already the third week. But I’ve did nothing.
I know that I have to eat. But instead of cooking, I bought lots of instant noodles with different flavours.
I know that I have to sleep. But instead of sleeping, I spent my time watching anime and drama.
I know that I have to catch up with the lecture. But instead of studying in the library, I skipped most of the lectures.
I know that I have to finish the tutes. But instead of revising, I waste my time reading non-sense story.
I understand that I really got lots of stuff to do. But I really cannot get into the momentum.
I understand that I can’t let time flies like that. But I really not in the mood to get my life back into right track.
I understand the point that I have to enjoy my uni life. But I really hate mixing around.
I understand that I have to appreciate the chance in studying abroad and walk around. But frankly, I rather stay in my room.
And now, I am far far behind. I am almost lost. Still, I don't feel like catching up. The leading light in front of me slowly is disappearing. Yet, I don't feel like following anymore.
Something has changed. But I don't know what changed.
My mind knows what to do. My heart doesn’t know what to follow.
May be there is something wrong with me. But I really don't know what goes wrong.
I am really really confused.
And down.
I know that I have to eat. But instead of cooking, I bought lots of instant noodles with different flavours.
I know that I have to sleep. But instead of sleeping, I spent my time watching anime and drama.
I know that I have to catch up with the lecture. But instead of studying in the library, I skipped most of the lectures.
I know that I have to finish the tutes. But instead of revising, I waste my time reading non-sense story.
I understand that I really got lots of stuff to do. But I really cannot get into the momentum.
I understand that I can’t let time flies like that. But I really not in the mood to get my life back into right track.
I understand the point that I have to enjoy my uni life. But I really hate mixing around.
I understand that I have to appreciate the chance in studying abroad and walk around. But frankly, I rather stay in my room.
And now, I am far far behind. I am almost lost. Still, I don't feel like catching up. The leading light in front of me slowly is disappearing. Yet, I don't feel like following anymore.
Something has changed. But I don't know what changed.
My mind knows what to do. My heart doesn’t know what to follow.
May be there is something wrong with me. But I really don't know what goes wrong.
I am really really confused.
And down.
Haha my dear friend, even though i haven't been talking to you for a while now, but i hope that you are still doing alright there ;)
回复删除From your post, it sounds like your heart still lingers about the past 3 months of carefree life that you had back in malaysia. You just have to pick back up your pace in your lectures and tutes.
The rationality of your mind and the desires of your heart sure does make it hard for you to choose which to listen to. But trust me, once you start studying, feel the achievement in completing your studying for even if its just two subtopics of lectures, you'd slowly gain it back.
The best way to get started, my dear friend, is to force yourself into doing those things which are currently in your I-know-I-should-but-I-don't-want-to list. Once you do that for a few times, you'd find yourself doing it more often, without needing to force yourself anymore.
"The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet." - probably a quote that you would nod true yet your heart still refuses to do it. hahaha just thought of sharing it with you.
Perhaps its the lack of motivation that you find yourself not wanting to do things, but remember, Whatever that you're doing now, you're doing it all for yourself in the future. Not for him, not for her. Its for yourself.
Oh, and by the way, the MSG in the instant noodles makes your brain less efficient and less productive.. so you should really cut that down ;)
回复删除haha..thx a lot..lol..ur comment seems much longer than my post leh..anyway,reli thx yea^^my laktop gt some prob..tats y i din sign in to msn for long time dy..nice to know u anyway..
回复删除ps:the way u talk reli lik..my dad..haha..tot ure a bit younger than me..^^
u too..take care and gambateh yea my fren..
Haha, my comment is only half of your post. Wouldn't want to outdo the author ;)
回复删除Ohh, i see i see, no wonder I haven't been seeing you online for such a long time. Well, maybe your father and I, we're alike. Age doesn't limit one's capacity of thinking.
Anyway, hope that you'd be able to get on with your life in Australia. Be happy with whatever that you do, that should the main point.
And thanks for posting up in English. Does make it a lot easier for me to read it all. Haha ;)
Its always nice talking to you. Maybe one day, we'd do that again. Till then, take care.